10 Things about Focusing – TEN – Make the choices you really want

CHOICE! How easy is it for you?

Does it feel open, as if one of many colours would be OK? 

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Or does it feel heavy with consequences, win or lose?

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Do you find it difficult to make some decisions, especially big ones?

Do you get worried you will upset someone or get their disapproval by choosing to do (or not do) a particular thing? 

Do you find it difficult to know what you really want?

Do you worry about making the ‘wrong’ choice?

If so, you will know how it feels to keep revolving the choices round and round in your head without finding an answer. 

Believe me, there is a way to find out and actively choose what is really best for you. It comes from inside of you, and if it is right for you, it will be right for everyone else around you. 

It took me a long time in my life to realise this. I would reach a inner sense of peace that a decision felt ‘right’ for me, but then it would be assailed by another part of me that simply feared ‘I will get this wrong’, looking outside, to other people who cared about me, society – or even God himself – to have the ultimate judgement on whether I was doing the right thing or not. And I often felt frozen and trapped in this pincer.

If you recognise any of this, I would like to tell you this:

Focusing helps you leave behind these choppy seas, where your boat is being tossed by every wind and wave that comes its way. It helps you drop anchor deep within yourself and enables you to explore clearly what are the real choices and what they mean to you. Focusing helps you connect with ALL the parts of you involved in the decision – those that want something, and those that are frightened of wanting or taking it, as well as those that are practical about it. You will be able to listen to all of them and honour all parts of the equation, whatever you eventually decide. And the part of you that fears ‘the wrong choice’ will feel a bit – maybe even a lot – safer.

Focusing really can help you find a way through this place of being stuck. Find a new freedom! Call me on 07795 324575 to find out more.

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